Fear

I'm afraid to be happy. I'm afraid to get close with anyone. I'm afraid to open up to people. I'm afraid to get close with anyone again. I'm afraid to feel. I'm afraid to trust people. 

Because I knew one day everyone will eventually leave, whether you like it or not.

I was happy. I used to feel happy. I told almost everyone my problems. I trust too easily.

But that was a really long time ago.

I learnt shiet, the hard way. 

I learnt that people have their own life. Telling them your problems to anyone will not solve the problem. Because at the end, you're the one who will face your own problems.

 All alone. All by yourself.

I used to run away from my problems when I was younger. I'm too scared to face my problems all by myself. I expect others to solve it for me. Otherwise, I want my people to solve it together with me.

And somehow I forgot that my friends have their own problems to solve too.

I was too dependent on others. 

Humans are meant to be alone. 

Even when there are friends around, it's you who will fight for your own battle. 

Everyone has their battle to fight for.

It's your life. Not theirs.

Friends are only a part of your life. They won't be with you forever.

Well, maybe one or two will. 

I'm afraid that I will be alone at the end. I mean I know I will be but I'm just afraid. I'm afraid that I won't have enough time to spend with my loved ones.